(no subject)

[serene]

Men who explain things.

(I allow men to explain things to me that I already understand, far too often. They should stop it, and I should stop allowing it.)

[Edit: To those men who are explaining linux text editors to me, I didn't mean you. I *don't* understand this, and I appreciate the help. It's coincidence that I ran across this article at this time. :-)]

Comments

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

The key is to not let them get away with it.

Actually, I think the key is for them not to do it, but since I'm not them, not letting them get away with it is sometimes the best I can do.

[inflectionpoint.livejournal.com]

Yes.

It's not my responsibility to teach these folks (who are overwhelmingly men in my experience) basic social skills and how to take turns and that Women Are People Too.

It's just not.

Unfortunately, that means my choices are: avoid such critters when I find them, call them on their shit, or sit there and suffer. I tend toward avoiding them when possible, and I've left partners over this issue. I am an adult. Conversations are two way streets. I am not going to stick around to be talked AT, patronised, or ignored.

I used to try calling them on it, and it doesn't work very well for me. I regret losing the opportunity for connection with these people, but I'm not willing to put up with this. It's a sad situation for all.

But... I'm not going to call them on it, spoonfeed them how to treat Women Like People, and praise them every time they get a fraction of it right and be endlessly reassuring. I want to spend my time and energy on my own life and my own work, which I've got a ton of. I spent the first years of my life doing other people's scutwork, I'm through with it.

[porcinea.livejournal.com]

I'm not going to call them on it, spoonfeed them how to treat Women Like People, and praise them every time they get a fraction of it right and be endlessly reassuring.

Amen! We have enough t-shirts.