Notes about the doctor visit yesterday

[serene]

In which I muse about health and doctors and weight. Please skip if this is not what you want to read about.



Why is it that I always like my specialists so much more than my primary physicians? I wish the endocrinologist I saw yesterday could be my doctor. He was gentle, personable, efficient, and didn't tell me that all my problems would be solved if I would only lose some weight.

I wanna talk about the procedure itself, because it was fascinating, but I'll put it at the very end, because it's icky.

About health: I am a contradiction. On the one hand, I feel really happy with my body and my health. On the other hand, I have all these symptoms that annoy me, and if you heard me list them, you would think I was a total wreck. The dizziness alone makes me sometimes feel like a liar for saying I'm in good health. Yet for some reason, I feel like a generally healthy person, and I'm happy with the way my body puts up with a fair amount of neglect.

The biopsy doesn't worry me. I have a feeling it's nothing, and even if it's not, I'll deal. Won't be the first serious problem I've worked through, won't be the last, I reckon.

I weigh 70 pounds less than I did when I met someotherguy. I know this because it was shortly after we met that I started losing weight rapidly, as my relationship with cute-poet-chick fell apart and I started spending my time with someotherguy in physically active ways.

I was afraid at first that I was dropping weight because I was ill; it pissed me off that the doctor didn't take that seriously. I mean, I've been the same weight all my adult life, and suddenly I'm dropping 10 or 20 pounds a month, and she thinks this is necessarily a good thing? *sigh* Anyway, some stuff feels better (more flexibility, easier sex, more energy (probably because the anemia is cleared up and I'm moving more)), but there are some drawbacks.

I don't like the looseness of my skin now. I used to fill out all of my skin, and now I only fill out some of it. I don't like that my cute tight clothes are now loose, and my loose clothes are now unwearable. I don't like that people compliment me as though I've done something praiseworthy. I don't like that my hips have given me trouble on and off, I think in reaction to all the walking and, um, flexibility-testing.

Stuff about the doctor visit:



Squick space:










































When he told me there was a lump on my thyroid, I didn't worry. When he told me he needed to take some of the fluid out of it to send to the lab, I worried a little. He numbed the area and inserted a needle. What he took out was that black blood stuff you see from a blood blister. He said that it looked like plain old cyst fluid to him, and those are common and respond well to benign neglect. But there was a spot that was very sensitive to his probing, so he got a new needle out and took a few painful jabs at it. The fluid he brought out of that one was more like clear red blood, and he refused to speculate on what it was. What he didn't do is say "Oh, no problem, looks like another cyst." He is sending both samples to the lab. I should know shortly after Christmas. Not worried, but concerned and curious.

Comments

[hobbitblue.livejournal.com]

Good to hear your specialists know their stuff - and I sympathise with the "everything will be wondrous if you weigh less" attitude. Kind of worrying your regular doc saw the rapid loss as a good sign, though feeling better and having more energy is definitely a good thing (I've only lost a couple of pounds recently and its already making a difference), and being more, er, *flexible* is always handy ::grin::
Hope the results of the biopsy come back fine. On the skin thing, have you tried yoga or chi kung or any of those other toning type things to get the skin to spring back a bit?

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

I haven't tried any of those things, but I want to start yoga (in my copious free time, right?). :-)

[hobbitblue.livejournal.com]

:)

I'd love to sign up for yoga classes one day, not that I know much about such things, but I just mention it because I've been doing very gentle chi kung based on the 8 section brocade (http://www.egreenway.com/taichichuan/esb.htm) and its toning me up visibly already.. I was hoping to do belly dance by now too but its still a tad ambitious, grr.

[wild-irises.livejournal.com]

Here's good wishes on the biopsy results, and yay, you, for the presence of mind to observe under those circumstances.

As for feeling healthy despite evidence to the contrary, it seems to me that feeling healthy is almost certain to be A Good Thing, and likely to lead to better overall general health. The dizziness does concern me; dizziness is notoriously difficult to diagnose, though not all that difficult to treat once diagnosed. There's a fabulous web page which you can find by searching on "Dizziness Explained" which has helped two friends of mine in the past several years. One had a (benign) brain tumor and the other had chronic hyperventilation syndrome. Both are way better now.

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you so much for the pointer. The neurologist speculated that it might be an inner-ear virus, because he ruled out a lot of other stuff, but I still don't know what causes this, and sometimes it's bad enough to keep me home and off the roads. Here's the link in case anyone wants it: http://www.pneuro.com/publications/dizzy/

Are you home now?

[lcohen]

they weighed me yesterday but i don't know how much i've lost because i have no idea where i started. nevertheless, while i haven't lost as much as you, i've lost quite a bit. my skin isn't so much loose as *covered* with stretch marks. last time this happened, people told me to try vitamin e cream. i couldn't find one that i wasn't allergic to the scent of, but you might have better luck than i did.

*hugs* for healthy biopsy results.

[lcohen]

oh, and what meds are you on? you may recall that i was dizzy a lot and it turned out to be one of my inhalers.

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

It's been going on for about eight or nine years; for most of that time, I was on no medications at all. The last two years, I've tried a couple of different birth-control pills and started iron supplements, but they didn't seem to affect the dizziness one way or the other. It seems to be worse and more frequent when my lower back is giving me trouble, but beyond that, I have no clue.

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

Thanks, sweetie.

(Is it weird that I adore my stretch marks? I don't think of them as tiger stripes, as firecat does, which is adorable, but I like them. More like ribbons.)

[wild-irises.livejournal.com]

Yes, I'm home (in fact, I was home when I spoke to you and stonebender on Monday).

The quick test for chronic hyperventilation syndrome (which was extraordinarily potent on the friend I have who had it) is to hyperventilate for a minute or two and see what it does to your dizziness. Don't try this unless you're someplace where you can afford to be a lot dizzier than you are (i.e., at home, sitting down). If in fact hyperventilating does make you dizzier, try hyperventilating into a paper bag, so that you have to reinhale the CO2 you are losing.

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

Oh, I thought you were calling us from out of town.

I'll try the hyperventilating thing -- I assume I wouldn't necessarily know it if I were doing it?

[wild-irises.livejournal.com]

Well, kimberly_a certainly didn't know she was doing it, until she tried the intentional version described above. And while the neurologist immediately recognized her breathing pattern as chronic hyperventilation, I had never noticed anything at all, nor had her husband or other friends. (I don't have the slightest reason to think this diagnosis applies to you, but it's an easy enough test.)

[stonebender.livejournal.com]

Maybe a little wierd, but in a way I really like.

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

Thanks, babe. *suh-mooch*!

[stonebender.livejournal.com]

Humm. I must be particularly unobservant. I really haven't noticed any change. I know you said you lost weight and I believe you. I just don't see it. For the record, I love all your skin.

[danger-chick.livejournal.com]

I have a benign tumor on my thyroid. It started as a cyst some time in high school and some time later (10 years or so) it became a benign tumor. There is a chance that it might turn into a malignant tumor but not so quickly. There are only like 3 types of thyroid cancer. One will kill you quicker than it takes you to figure out what is happening and the other two you can live with decades without having to do anything about the tumor. My doc said that people have been known to have tumors on their thyroids for decades without problems. The only time it becomes a concern is when it affects the functioning of my thyroid. If that happens, it is hasta la vista thyroid for me.

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

Glad you're doing well. I'm gonna choose not to think "tumor" unless/until they say "tumor". :-)

[figmo.livejournal.com]

Good luck with the biopsy. I wish your endocrinologist were around here. I've had too many tell me my weight, which came on after I became hypoglycemic, was the cause of my hypoglycemia.

[hermorrine.livejournal.com]

I don't like that people compliment me as though I've done something praiseworthy.

I know exactly how you feel. When my diabetes was totally out of control back in 97 I dropped a lot of weight and people were constantly complimenting me. I would just nod but one day I snapped and said "Gee thanks - I'm losing weight because I'm SICK." The poor woman was really shocked.

BTW, we are mirroring each others' lives! Today I saw the endo (which was awesome, I echo what you said about wishing she was my PCP) and tomorrow I see the dentist (although for a regular cleaning).

[firecat]

I haven't noticed a change either, and I often do.

(You look fabulous as always!)

[purpletigron.livejournal.com]

Yeah - unexplained changes in weight of any kind can be a symptom of serious illness. I've dropped about 10 lb in the past few months, as much due to worrying about my Sick Kitty as anything. Yet people say, "I'm so jealous of you...". Wah.

Good luck with the test results. I hope to get my NMR results next week, and find out whether I have cancer, some other rare disease, or no problem...

[ailbhe]

baratron definitely had no idea she was hyperventilating, and it was making her pretty sick.

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

Yes, when people look at me in congratulatory mode and say "how did you lose all that weight?", I frown and say "I got divorced."

I am hoping for no problem on your NMR. All my best to you.

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

Thank you both. *smooch*

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

Grrrr! I had mine tell me that my menstrual problems were because of my weight, even though the problems came on suddenly, my hormone levels were normal, and I'd been the same weight for ten years. Grr.

[boxofdelights]

Excellent answer.