Oy

[serene]

Take one week. Add driving rain and hail. Stir in the first week of college, a mom in the hospital, chest pains, lack of sleep, a death in my community at work, tragedies in Haiti, and a street closed off because of a shootout, and you get a really stressed Serene.

However.

Mix in the love and support of a big family, the Best Job Ever, and the potential for a substantial tax refund, and things don't look quite as gloomy.



The important parts first: Mom is fine. I am fine. The kid likes school.

The kid and college:

She likes it! I am thrilled. So far, she's been to four of her five classes. Sounds like she'll have a lot to keep her busy, and a class or two of easy-A stuff. I'm fine with easy-A stuff. I want her to enjoy college, and to explore what kinds of things she might like to do. It's early days yet, but she's been happy and energized since about a week before school started, and she still is. I'll take it. Plus, even well before this, she's just been a joy to be around; I really like this kid.

It's really nifty that her school is only 3/4 mile away from my office, and the kid who hates walking has been so energized after school that she walks up to my office to see me after classes. It's freaking adorable.

My mom:

Mom had chest pains at work yesterday. Her co-workers made her sit and rest, and then they called an ambulance. They scared my nephew by telling him they thought she'd had a heart attack, which of course scared the rest of us, too. She didn't have a heart attack. She's had a bad cold lately, and she probably pulled some chest muscles. Big relief, but still a stressy day.

My heart:

My mom's heart is "remarkably healthy", according to the doctor. Mine, not quite so much. I mean, normally it is -- or, rather, pre-cancer it was -- but the medication I'm on to suppress my cancer risk makes my heart beat too strongly, and makes my heart palpitations really bad, in addition to giving me scary chest pains. Unfortunately, the doc wants to raise the suppression-medicine dose, which will make the heart stuff worse, so she wants to put me on a beta blocker first. (Beta blockers slow down the heart, essentially weakening it on purpose -- I do not like this idea.) I have to think it over. I am undecided, and am open for input, though I don't promise to respond to or follow the input.

The really good stuff:

Hot-tubbing with bright, interesting people. Dinners out with other bright, interesting people. Lovely day with stonebender yesterday. The Best Job Ever is still awesome. My doctor listens to me and lets me make my own decisions. People are responding to the tragedies in Haiti with money and love and solid help. My family is ULTRA sweet and helpful when I'm down or sick or just need them to be there for me. I've bought a bunch of the kid's school supplies and stuff and still have money left to start buying her books (and a raincoat and some decent shoes). someotherguy is going to fix the magazine situation for me.

Comments

[firecat]

I have an ongoing quarrel with my cardiologist about beta blockers. Um, so it's already hard enough for me to exercise, and you want to make it worse? How is that supposed to help my health?

However, I don't have chest pains.

Would it be an option for you to try the beta blockers for a couple of weeks and see how it feels?

[serene]

That's certainly an option. Thank you.

[wild_irises]

I love you.

[serene]

Love you, too. Thanks.

[aquaeri]

I don't have useful advice about the medication, just sympathising big-time. I wish more doctors were aware that very few medications fix anything, they just make your body do something different than it normally does, and sometimes that's a net benefit and sometimes it's not. I don't know about beta-blockers, but the medications I have these issues around seem to be ones with a particularly large range of reactions from people, with doctors failing to sufficiently acknowledge that just because drug X works wonderfully for some people, doesn't mean it will for you, or that the "side effects" won't be more bothersome for you.